Alexia's Views

How to Approach Inner Office Relationships

How do you approach your colleagues at work from a relationship perspective? Do you interact at the office only and talk when you must? Do you have lunch together sometimes and part ways in the evenings and weekends only to resume office relationships on Monday? Or,do you go the extra mile to engage your work colleagues into your personal life away from your desk?

I'll admit I've generally fallen into category number one. I have tended to do my own thing and not say too much. But, over time, I realized it didn't add to my success at work. I think the perception if you are a loner, is that you are unhappy and don't like people. That may be you, but it's not me. 

I recently had the opportunity to join a friend and his colleagues out for a team dinner. Over the course of the meal and conversation, I realized the rapport and camaraderie built up among the team was so strong, and I was convinced that events like this meal are part of the reason why. They treated each other like friends in addition to co-workers. They look out for one another and treat each other with the love of friends.

After recently going through a major attitude adjustment about choosing joy and happiness over listening to voices of fear and timidity, I decided I wanted to adopt more of the inner office relationships that I observed at the dinner. Since then, I made a concerted effort to stop and speak to people as I pass by in the office. It doesn't have to be an in depth conversation that pulls people away from their work for a half hour. We know those people too. Since making an effort to invest in my office relationships, I've noticed I'm seeing more success in my work. I enjoy the work I'm doing more, and I like engaging with my friends while I happen to be at the office. There are many ways you can improve your work relationships. Just try.

I envision developing a work family in the true sense of the word, family. I want to support my work family through busy times, joys, and trials. Just think if your work environment can supplement your emotional state the way your home life can. If you have those strong relationships in place, your happiness at work can really propel forward.

As in any relationship, you don't enter the state of closeness immediately. It takes time and a conscious effort to be considerate of your neighbor. If you've got nothing else, just smile and say, "hi."

I know I'm putting a new foot forward in my approach to more effective inner office relationships. I hope you will too because you can!

Thinking of My Mom this Mother's Day

As Mother's Day comes to a close this year, I'd like to stop to think about my dear mom, and all she has done for me. Not only did she give me life but she sacrificed and worked tirelessly with my father to provide a good life for me and my brother.

My mother, Elaine, was born into a Greek-American, immigrant family in Mississippi. She grew up in the restaurant business, just like I did. She was on the pep squad in high school, and graduated from Millsaps College in Jackson, MS with a degree in elementary education. Soon thereafter mom and dad met while mom was on summer vacation in Greece. After they were married, mom and dad continued in the family business.

I don't remember much about my early childhood, but I have an overwhelming sense of being loved and having fun. My mom cared for me and took me to play with other kids. She saw me through swimming lessons, gymnastics, ballet, and piano. I had a completely joyful childhood that I am grateful for having daily. No one can ever take that experience away from me, and I have my mom and dad to thank for it. 

When I was old enough to be in school, mom went back to work in the family restaurant to help provide for our family. Though the restaurant business seems glamorous on television with shows like Top Chef, Iron Chef and America's Next Great Restaurant, but the honest truth is that restaurants are lots of hard, physical work. And work she did all the way up until I was in college and mom and dad moved back to Greece.

On this Mother's Day occasion, I thank my mom for loving me through the joys and challenges, for the years of labor she put in for my brother and me. I thank her for listening and giving, for raising us in a house full of love, and for reminding me to "Be a lady" every time I left the house. Mom instilled in us a good sense of right and strong values. 

Through all her work and teachings, my mom is also beautiful and classy. She's a petite, sophisticated lady who appreciates quality and excellence. She's an amazing cook and baker, and she's never shy to share her food (one of her qualities I'm so glad to have inherited).

For all the complaining we do about our moms, it's important to remember all they do for us. As different as each one of us is, we all have mothers, and it's wonderful to have this day set aside to remind us to appreciate our moms.

She affirms, supports, and encourages me. She's a top member of my personal board of directors. She's an ear when I need her and constant sounding board for my approach to life. Thanks mom. I can because of you!

To Try, Or Not To Try?

Do you have a dream you want to pursue? Do you desire to embark on a new career path, move to a new city, or try for something that seems far fetched and out of reach? I know I sure do. That's how I felt when I first thought of publishing my book, Views form the 13th Floor: Conversations with My Mentor. I wanted to try, but for the longest time assumed no one would care about it. Over time, the dream remained, and I found a way for it to become a reality.

I have assumed many wrong things in my life and listened to fears far more than I care to admit. Listening to the voice that says, "You can't," has often kept me from even trying for something. Then one day I got fed up! If our thoughts determine our lives, then why can't my thoughts tell me, "You can!" That's what I tell you each week, and I should practice what I preach.

After reading The Secrect, The Master Key System, and other books that talk about the powerful impact our thoughts have on what manifests in our lives, I decided to put away that voice of fear. I am going to try for every dream and vision I have that remains with me for more than a fleeting moment. If I continue to see a goal and have a dream, then why on earth shouldn't I try? The Secret says to use the power of visualization to picture your dream as a reality and then release it. Rhonda Byrne and contributors to the book say not to worry about the "how," but to just stay focused on the "what." 

There is a lovely quote by Martin Luther King Jr. that says, "Faith is taking the first step even if you don't see the whole staircase." Doesn't that summarize the beginning of achieving all of our goals? We just need to take the first step and have faith that the next step will appear followed by the next step, until the entire staircase to your goal has been revealed.

When I once expressed a fear of trying to my mentor, Rhonda Shasteen, she told me to think of all the potential outcomes. She then said that if you're OK with how things can turn out, you should go for it. Sometimes that means it won't turn out how you like or imagine. She said that unless the end result might be death or something permanently damaging to you or someone else, then why not go for it?

Henry Ford said, "Whether you think you can or you think you can't, either way, your right!" Just believing in yourself and focusing on seeing yourself reaching that end goal can make all the difference. I'm going to keep trying each day and encourage you to do the same because you can!

Visualization Techniques

Last week, I wrote about The Power of Visualization, and this week I want to offer some examples of techniques you can use to employ this powerful tool. Through visualizing your dreams and desires you offer a positive energy to move them towards them becoming a reality. Below I'll share three techniques that will help you visualize things you hope will manifest into your life.

1. Imagine. This is the easiest tool to employ, but it takes a level of effort and concentration. I'll confess that I have a long history of not allowing myself to envision certain things I wanted in my life out of fear of scaring them away. This superstition served me in just the opposite manner. I took the hopeful vision captive and discarded it, and as a result, the vision never materialized.

Now I'm changing my approach and allowing my self to imagine everything from a parking space, to getting a check in the mail, to getting that phone call I've been waiting for. I will sit, and in my mind's eye see the parking space available and watch myself pulling into it. I'll go to the mailbox expecting checks in the mail, and I look at my phone and see the email I'm looking for on the screen. The reality may not manifest right away, but it has been happening. If you want to close a deal, imagine yourself shaking hands or viewing the signed contract. Allow yourself to feel the feeling of it being a done deal and release it. See yourself at your ideal weight or in that desired relationship, and let it go.

This process felt unnatural to me and still does a little, but the more I practice it, the more I'm coming to embrace it. What's so bad about putting a positive thought into the world anyway? I'd rather be positive than fearful.

2. Make a Vision Board. Creating a vision board helps take some of the heavy lifting off of your imagination and puts it onto paper. Print out photos of what you want. Is it a car, a job, a vacation or a certain physique? Print it out, put it on a board, and look at it daily. If you don't want to print things, then pin the images on Pinterest and look at them regularly. This will help your dreams become your reality.

3. Write out your wish list. The final technique is to write your wants down and read them daily. I wrote my list down, and I read it in the morning and before I go to bed to remind myself of where I want to direct my thoughts and energy.

Visualization techniques can be applied to your health, wealth, and relationships. If thoughts are really that powerful in directing your life, don't you want your thoughts to be focused on the things you want? I know I do. I'm practicing everyday to make my dreams come true. I've seen a lot of success so far and am excited to see what else comes to life. I encourage you to visualize your dreams into reality because you can!