It's happened to me plenty of times. I guess it's a more common occurrence in writers, thus the popular term "writer's block."
When I was in graduate school, I'd work on projects in my marketing and finance classes. As we were presented with projects, I would think and struggle and come up with absolutely nothing creative or interesting. That still happens today as I try to create meaningful dynamic content in my work. Sometimes I can think and ponder for hours and continue to hit a brick wall.
I remember asking a friend of mine who was in a Ph.D. program how he overcame mental blocks. He gave me good advice that I use to this day.
His advice was simple. Go do something else for a while. Stop thinking about it. Occupy your mind with another activity, and before you know it, you have a "Eureka! moment" with new ideas to try. Those moments of breakthrough are so gratifying, especially if you come up with a good solution to your problem.
Doing something else is good and well, but what if you don't have an A-Ha moment? What if you have a deadline and nothing remarkable to share? That can be quite stressful, particularly in an economy where if you don't contribute significantly every time, then you could be out the doorstep in no time.
When I'm up against time and a lack of bright ideas, I turn to my mentors. These folks are often part of my personal board of directors too. Over the years, I've managed to assemble a group of friends and mentors in my industry who are wiser and more experienced than I. Not only are they brilliant, but they are also generous with their time. I'll reach out to these mentors as sounding boards about the project, approach, and possible solutions. They have never let me down and help me come up with something valuable to offer to my team.
When you have a mental block think of something else and seek help. You can!
How many times do you text message a day? Do you prefer to text or call? Do you like to Skype or talk over coffee or dinner? I remember the days before text
messaging, and I also remember the days before unlimited text messaging. Everyone talked on a land line or hogged roll over cell phone minutes. May be I’m old now, or maybe I remember a more pure way of doing things.
Texting offers so many benefits and conveniences. It is quick, simple, and gets to the point. You can read in places that are too loud to hear, and you can take time to think about what you are saying before you actually communicate it. There are many benefits to texting; however, it seems that actually talking to another person is becoming a lost art.
In the last month, someone I know very casually asked me to help him make contacts in market research and data analytics. He asked me if I might know someone at my company or at another company. I smiled and let him know that I did have a few contacts in that area. I spent a few years dabbling in market research to learn that I respect the analytics, but that processing the data was not for me. It was a wonderful learning experience, and I made some wonderful friends. Wherever I go for work, I end up doing some level of data analysis or working directly with the analytics groups. It turned out to be a huge blessing in experience although I didn't choose to pursue my career there.
I connected my acquaintance with a couple of friends after reaching out and getting the okay to make the connection. It was fun to help, and one day he asked me why I was doing it all for him. I didn't feel awkward about sharing my contacts at all. In fact, I felt blessed to be able to do it. I told him I was paying it forward.
On this St. Valentine's Day, I thought it would be nice to take a slightly more in depth look at the meaning of love. Across cultures and languages, love has a different meaning. In English there's just one word for love, but in Greek there are many words to express the kind of love you are feeling.
St. Valentine
Webster's dictionary defines love as a strong affection for another rising out of kinship or personal ties.
Another description of love says, "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." That passage is from 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 in the Bible. Though it is from a Christian book, its meaning rings true across many cultures and religions and is echoed throughout.
Other meanings for love include:
Eros- the Greek word for passionate love.
Agape- the Greek word expressing the brotherly love between siblings and parents and children.
Filia- expresses friendly love.
Caritas- the Latin word to show brotherly love.
With all the different ways we can love, let's take a moment today to reflect in self-awareness and think about who we can love more. Can we show more love to our parents and friends, spouses and children? I'm blessed with lots of agape around me. My parents show me their love. My mentor, Rhonda Shasteen, shows me her sisterly love for me through being my sounding board with her constant support and caring of my well-being. Sometimes I stop in awe of the profound blessing in my life. I'm grateful to have love and aim to share that love with you with each post. Since St. Valentine's Day isn't just about the Eros kind of love, I'm wishing you a very Happy Valentine's Day!
For the last ten months, I have been on a beautiful journey of learning to make new choices of happiness and joy. I've been practicing the art of allowing and learning to lighten up and follow my bliss. All of this practice is in an effort to overwrite long-ingrained pathways of though led by negativity, self-criticism, guilt, and self-inflicted choices of suffering. One day last April, I was exposed to a new way of doing things that could lead to a life of joy and bliss, while manifesting my greatest desires. It has been the journey of a lifetime.
Do you struggle with your self-love and sense of worth? I spent a log of time feeling guilty for choosing to love myself because I believed a lie that loving myself was a choice of vanity. Then I learned there is a difference between vanity and self-love.
Now that I can distinguish the two things, I embarked on the journey of learning to grow self-love. One way I grow my thought pattern and expose myself to new ways of approaching self-love is through reading a blog completely focused on the subject called the Abundance Tapestry.
Through reading that blog and other things in addition to my own thoughts, I thought I would share a few thins you can do to grow self-love now.
1. Buy yourself a gift. Gift giving is one of the Five Love Languages, so being nice to yourself and buying yourself a gift can increase your self love immediately. That gift doesn't need to break the bank. It can be a chocolate bar or a bouquet of flowers. If you desire, buy yourself something you've had your eye on for a while.
2. Meditate with affirmations. This year I have also started meditating to open the pathways to my subconscious mind and develop my awareness, control of my mind and emotions. One meditation practice I use is to repeat reaffirming mantras. One that I use regularly as presented in The Secret by Rhonda Byrne is, "I am whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious, and happy." It encompasses all things and helps increase your sense of self-love within minutes.
3. Hug someone. Physical touch is another love language, so giving a friend or family member a hug can increase the energy of love instantaneously.
4. Exercise. Exercise increases the calmness of the mind while simultaneously releasing endorphins. Practicing some physical endurance at any level of difficulty is sure fire way to grow your inner sense of love.
5. Listen to your Inner voice and intuition. Finally, the more you practice meditation and quieting the mind, the easier it is to tune into your voice of intuition. That same voice is your best guide because it is the purest most honest voice of love within you. Just ask your intuition questions and meditate on it as you go to sleep, and you will be surprised to see the answers to your questions emerge unexpectedly. Discovering answers grows your sense of self-love and confidence in your true self exponentially.
Give any of these practices a try this week maybe if it is only to make a new choice. I encourage you to grow your selflove because you can!
My dear friends, I want to share a story with you about a friend of mine in hopes that you will revisit how careful you are being when out on the town. This story affects us single ladies mostly, but there are still opportunities for our married and spoken for friends to be taken advantage of too.
In today's world, it is just as common to meet people on-line through dating sites, as it is to meet potential dates through friends, via a hobby, a set up, or other means. I wanted to share this story with you because it made me take a second look at how careful I am when I go out. It is a good reminder for us all.
The story begins when my gal pal met a stand up looking fellow for a first meet/date from an online dating site.Things seemed to check out okay. They had exchanged several emails, agreed to meet in a public place and set up a time to meet.
Are you crazy busy? Is every moment of your day filled to the max? Do you have any margin of spare time? Do you spend time with yourself, reading, journaling,
thinking, or meditating, or is your day completely filled with friends, work, hobbies, and entertainment?
All activities that bring you joy add value to your life, yet just as in every other area of life, you need to balance entertainment activities with personal growth activities. You can probably spend 95% of your time on entertainment, and just a small amount of time on self, but if you neglect the 5% of time spent on yourself, then it can be very easy to grow imbalanced, disconcerted, and discontented. One of the reasons I write this blog, is to help me gel the thoughts I'm having as part of the time I spend with self. I choose to share them with you in hopes they may resonate with some thoughts you are having too.
It is that time again for chips and beer, hilarious commercials, and controversial half time shows, as we prepare for Super Bowl XLVII between the San Francisco 49ers and the Baltimore Ravens. After months of fierce competition, only two teams can make it to the final bout. There seems to be more excitement around the parties and food than the game itself.
With all the Super Bowl hype, I can't help but think about all the hard work it takes to get there, teamwork in particular. Not one team would be in the Super Bowl as a result of a single player alone. It's the joining of spirits and minds of all the players towards a common goal that takes the teams there. When my mentor, Rhonda Shasteen, and I talk about the team dynamic in our mentoring sessions, she always stresses the importance of working with your team and leaning on each other's unique experience to achieve the end goal.
Rhonda also highlights from time-to-time that is is possible to have team members out there with personal agendas who don't really get ahead in the end. People know when a counterpart has an agenda, and they don't support it. Unfortunately, that can be to the detriment of the group and your projects.
As we approach this year's Super Bowl, I challenge us all to stop to reflect in self-awareness, to see if we're doing everything we can to support our teams and the team's goals just like those players in the game. Your team can be a work team, family team, sports team, or volunteer team. You may realize you need to adjust your approach a bit, or you may be doing everything you can think of to help your team. Sometimes, you may need to give yourself an attitude adjustment in order to adopt that can do attitude that is willing to do whatever it takes to help the team win. having an attitude of gratitude for your role and your group will always render positive results.
Spend the next few days focusing on being a team player in honor of our teams. Go for the goal because you can, and may the best team win!
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